STOP EXERCISING: A Case Joyful Movement!

STOP EXERCISING: A Case Joyful Movement!

Facebooktwitterpinterestlinkedinmail

Stop exercising!!!

There I said it. I think exercising is ridiculous.

My clients often tell me they, too, do not want to exercise. They often ask me why they do not want to exercise. They know it is “good” for them, but they are unmotivated.

My clients are motivated to exercise when they start a diet. Once they stop losing weight and stop the diet, the exercise stops.

Aren’t we all supposed to want to exercise?

You can look up the many meanings of exercise in the dictionary and I am going to go for the common definition.

Merriam-Webster says physical exercise is:

  1. The regular or repeated use of a faculty or bodily organ.
  2. Bodily exertion for the sake of developing and maintaining physical fitness.

I have always thought exercise is something that I am supposed to want to do. I am supposed to want to be “physically fit,” whatever that might mean. I, and many of my clients, do not resonate with the idea of exercise.

There are some powerful reasons not to want to exercise:

  • Exercise is connected to the dieting cycle of restrict, binge, shame.
  • It can be hard and uncomfortable. Anyone who’s heard the term, “no pain, no gain” could agree.
  • You sweat A LOT, which can lead to embarrassment about your size.
  • Exercise can bring back the feelings from younger years of being shamed in P.E. class.
  • Your body is exposed through tight clothes. Gyms have LOTS of mirrors.
  • The ongoing judgment of yourself not being able to perform a physical task.
  • Exercise is connected to dieting: when I am on a diet, I exercise and when I am off the diet, I stop exercising.

The list of why we do not exercise is long. When we have a history of eating disorders and disordered eating, there is plenty of baggage with exercise.

When my clients ask, why should I exercise? I respond you shouldn’t exercise.

Shocking right?

Even though exercise is loaded with baggage, we are in bodies and need to engage in movement.

In Intuitive Eating we call it joyful movement.

We are meant to move our bodies in the way that works best for each of us. Everyone has a different level of capacity and ability.

Do what movement YOU can do.

We know from studies and experience that movement has many positive benefits:

  • Can help decrease depressive symptoms. Movement can get us to increase the endorphins our bodies need to feel better. Note: movement is not the cure for depression, but it can be a helpful part of your treatment. If you are experiencing depression, please seek out a licensed mental health professional.
  • Movement can help you sleep better. Being physically tired can be helpful.
  • My esthetician says my skin looks better since I have been engaging in more movement.
  • Lastly, we are in bodies that are made to be in motion and you get to define what that motion looks like.

What kind of movement should you engage in?

Here are some questions to help you figure it out:

  • What did you like to do when you were younger?

What did you like to do 10, 20, 30 years ago. What did you like to do as a child? These questions can bring back the passion for movement you had years earlier.

  • What kind of movement brings you joy?

I often ask myself what kind of movement will bring me joy today? This has led me to try many activities that I would not have normally tried. Yoga, Zumba, stand up paddle board, and running. The answer to the questions of movement and joy has changed over the years.

I had been attending a gym for years and I was feeling bored there, and my intuitive voice said I need yoga. Now I have been going to a yoga studio for a few months, my joy has increased exponentially.

  • What is fun to you?

Ask yourself regularly, what would be a fun activity? I have been amazed how much I will step out of my movement comfort zone when I embrace what is fun. I will swing at the park, dance, and try aerial yoga (this was scary, but fun).

Honestly, having a history of food issues has led can lead you to reject exercise for many different reasons.  I encourage you to reject exercise, too.

This does not mean I am encouraging you to sit on the couch all day.

Embrace movement in a way that works for you. For me, some days it is extra sweaty hiking, other days it is calm yin yoga.

Movement is critical to our body’s wellbeing. Disconnecting the movement from dieting is critical to enjoyment and it leads us to want to do it some more.

Try engaging in joyful movement. Look at what you can do that is fun and be active. This is not a race to finish first. It is an opportunity to reconnect with your body in a way that is pleasing to you.

Kim McLaughlin, MA is a Psychotherapist, Speaker, Author, and Coach who specializes in working with people who suffer from binge eating and emotional eating. She is a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. She is the author of the best-selling book Feed Your Soul Nourish Your Life! A Six Step System to Peace with Food and the Amazon #1 Best Selling book Discovery Your Inspiration.

You can find Kim on her podcast Feed Your Soul with Kim and you can find it on all podcast platforms.

Wondering if you are an emotional eater? Sign up for the free Am I an Emotional Eater Quiz.

Intuitive Eating Q and A

Intuitive Eating Q and A

Facebooktwitterpinterestlinkedinmail

In honor of the 100th episode of the Feed Your Soul with Kim Podcast, we asked our community (all of you) to submit your questions. Let’s see what you all want to know.

1) What are your thoughts on intermittent fasting?

This question is very timely with the rise of intermittent fasting.

These are two different approaches to eating.

First, intuitive eating is all about tuning in to your body’s natural signals and cultivating a healthy relationship with food.

Intuitive eating encourages you to listen to your hunger and fullness cues, honor your cravings, and find pleasure in eating.

It’s a mindful and flexible approach that emphasizes self-compassion and body acceptance.

On the other hand, intermittent fasting involves cycling between periods of eating and fasting. This method has gained popularity for its reported potential benefits. However, it’s important to examine intermittent fasting through an intuitive eating lens to understand its compatibility with this mindset.

From an intuitive eating perspective, it’s crucial to consider the underlying motivations behind utilizing intermittent fasting.

  • Are you doing it to listen to your body’s needs?
  • To feel more connected to your hunger and fullness signals?
  • Or are you using it as a tool for restriction or weight control?

The problem with intermittent fasting is it requires you eat during a certain time block, say 8 hours during the day and then not eat for 16 hours.

Some individuals may naturally gravitate to a time-restricted eating pattern, based on their hunger/fullness.

Intuitive eating promotes individualization and flexibility.

You are encouraged to trust your body’s wisdom rather than adhering strictly to external rules or prescribed eating patterns.

I ask my clients to consider the questions:

  • Does this feel like a diet?
  • Are you restricting food?
  • Do you eat when you are hungry?

An action step is to take a deep breath and listen to your body’s wisdom for what you need next.

What feels intuitively right for you?

It takes trust and embracing your own needs and values not based on a societal norm of restriction.

2) How can I have a day-to-day approach to my relationship with food focused on living life versus weight loss?

Imagine that you can wake up every day feeling empowered AND embrace food. To have the ability to make food choices from the needs of your body, rather than relying on what a diet guru tells you to do. Have a sense of peace in your relationship with food.

First, let’s look at breaking away from constant dieting and embrace a new perspective. I know this takes work, but there is a need to end the pursuit of weight loss and instead, focus on nourishing your body, listening to your body’s cues and look for food satisfaction.

This is a mindset shift that begins to lead you to food freedom.

Intuitive eating encourages you to trust your body’s innate wisdom.

Instead of rigid meal plans or calorie counting, listen to your hunger and fullness signals.

Take a moment to pause and ask yourself,

  • Am I hungry?
  • What foods would truly satisfy my cravings?
  • How can I honor my body’s signals and cue to eat?

Second, let’s look at food pleasure. Food is meant to be enjoyed, savored, and celebrated. Give yourself permission to experience and enjoy the flavors, textures, and aromas of food.

A simple question to ask is, “Am I enjoying this food?”

Incorporating intuitive eating into your life takes a mindful approach. This can seem like a daunting task since others often discuss their latest diet.

Here are some ideas to incorporate intuitive eating:

  • Surround yourself with a supportive community that champions intuitive eating.
  • Seek out resources, books, or podcasts that inspire and educate you about intuitive eating.
  • Get a supportive counselor, coach or registered dietitian who specializes in intuitive eating, guiding you on your journey towards food freedom.

It is critical to remember that this is not an overnight fix.

You do have the power to eat intuitively and enjoy your relationship with food.

3) “How can I reframe my ideas about food and nourishment to make overall well-being a priority rather than weight loss?”

It can be tough to look at food as nourishment when we are often taught to limit food and calories. It is a bold step to look at food as nourishment and part of our overall wellness (without restricting).

Start by appreciating the nourishment provided, the energy it instills, and the pleasure it brings to taste buds. It’s time to shift our focus from numbers on a scale to determine what health and wellness might look to each of us.

How do we start this movement from weight loss to food as nourishment?

Ask yourself…

  • How can I honor my body, nurture it with nourishing foods that support my well-being?
  • How can I savor each bite, finding joy in the flavors and textures that bring me happiness?
  • How can I support myself fully mind/body/spirit?

It’s through these inquiries that we pave the way for a new, empowering perspective.

Start by challenging the status quo of diet culture. The diet industry makes a lot of money off us being brainwashed that we must be a certain weight to be accepted, healthy, and worthy.

Let’s get into action by examining your relationship to dieting, diets, and weight loss.

How did you get to the spot?

This self-reflection can lead you to question more of your mindset around food AND what you have been taught.

When we were little, we knew what to eat, how much, and when. We lost track of this inner knowledge a long time ago. Dieting takes us out of this inner knowing.

I know it can feel scary to think of being on your own with food. Seek out support. You do not have to do this alone.

4) What is intuitive eating and how can it help me develop a healthier relationship with food?

Intuitive eating is not another diet fad or quick fix. It’s a totally different way of looking at food, weight, bodies, emotions, and mindset around food.

Truthfully, it is about listening to your body’s internal cues, utilizing your body’s hunger and fullness signals, and making food choices from a place of what you really need.

First, intuitive eating is not restrictive, and it relies on your ability to determine your body needs at any point in time.

It can be scary to trust your body’s signals, pleasure, and satisfaction.

We tune inside of ourselves to listen to physical hunger and emotional hunger. We, also, tune into what foods will satisfy us.

The goal is to heal your relationship with food, by ending shame/guilt and the cycle of restriction and binging.

Second, intuitive eating is not just about the food; it is about your whole being: mind, body, and spirit. It’s a transformative journey that ripples into every aspect of your life.

Third, the path to intuitive eating is to:

  • Start listening to your body.
  • Follow your body’s signals.
  • Release external rules.
  • Look for a supportive group that embraces intuitive eating.

Remember, we are looking for a relationship with food that is nourishing, peaceful, and totally free from guilt.

It is important to consult with a qualified healthcare professional or registered dietitian who can guide you in making informed decisions about your eating habits. They can help you navigate the potential benefits and considerations of intermittent fasting and how it aligns with your overall well-being goals.

Kim McLaughlin, MA is a Psychotherapist, Speaker, Author, and Coach who specializes in working with people who suffer from binge eating and emotional eating. She is a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. She is the author of the best-selling book Feed Your Soul Nourish Your Life! A Six Step System to Peace with Food and the Amazon #1 Best Selling book Discovery Your Inspiration.

You can find Kim on her podcast Feed Your Soul with Kim and you can find it on all podcast platforms.

Wondering if you are an emotional eater? Sign up for the free Am I an Emotional Eater Quiz.

Taking Care of Your Wellness

Taking Care of Your Wellness

Facebooktwitterpinterestlinkedinmail

Taking care of our wellness is critical in achieving our goals and ensuring our well-being. As we embrace National Wellness Month, we are reminded of the importance of self-care and finding balance in our daily lives.

National Wellness Month offers a chance for individuals and organizations to focus on wellness goals and explore ways to enhance health and happiness. This is a time to create routines, make healthier choices, and practice self-care.

There are many ways to move into wellness. Here are three essential ideas to help you on your wellness journey.

First, start to prioritize Self-Care.

Self-care is crucial in enhancing our overall well-being, but it can be challenging to make time for it in our busy lives. Taking care of yourself helps to reduce stress, improve moods, and increase energy levels. Self-care can take many forms, and it is up to you to decide what works for you.

Start with asking yourself:

“What is my form of self-care?”

Your needs for self-care are different than other’s needs. Make self-care a priority by setting aside time each day (preferably) or week for activities that nourish your body and mind.

This week my daughter started back to school, and my schedule is now changing, and I am relooking at where self-care will fit into my day. I have begun a more regimented morning routine. I am focusing on some quiet time and fun time with my daily Wordle.

Second, see where you are with your nutrition.

The food we eat plays a vital role in our overall health and wellness. In intuitive eating we call it Gentle Nutrition.

What you eat influences how you feel and the energy you have during the day.

When I focus on intuitive eating, I am more centered in my body and what it needs. I make decisions about my food that is right for me and my body.

We have been taught over the years not to pay attention to what our bodies tell us to eat, but to look to an external force (diet) to tell us what our right food is. Limitations of types of food set us up to binge and overeat. Check inside and see what your right foods are.

By focusing on gentle nutrition, we can power our bodies and minds to achieve wellness.

Third, make movement a habit.

Exercise is crucial in enhancing our physical AND mental health. It can improve our cardiovascular health, reduce stress, and boost energy levels. I like to call it movement, since there is a cultural idea that exercise should be hard.

It can be challenging to move your body regularly, so start small. Consider taking a walk in the morning or evening or incorporating yoga or stretching into your daily routine.

I have found it is critical to find an activity that I enjoy. When I like the movement, I will do it more often and more regularly. I had read that weight training was good for the body and increases our body capacity as we age.

That sounded good to me.

Over the last year I have engaged in regular weightlifting, and I find I enjoy it, so I do it more often.

Movement is a not to be missed part of your wellness but find what your form of movement is.

In conclusion, National Wellness Month offers us a chance to focus on our wellness goals. It is a reminder that we must come first in our day.

Prioritizing self-care, focusing on nutrition, and making movement a habit are essential ideas to promote a wellness path.

Remember to take small steps each day and find what works for you. Achieving wellness is not an end point, but a journey towards wellness.

I encourage you to have this month be a reminder to embrace wellness in all its many forms.

Kim McLaughlin, MA is a Psychotherapist, Speaker, Author, and Coach who specializes in working with people who suffer from binge eating and emotional eating. She is a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. She is the author of the best-selling book Feed Your Soul Nourish Your Life! A Six Step System to Peace with Food and the Amazon #1 Best Selling book Discovery Your Inspiration.

You can find Kim on her podcast Feed Your Soul with Kim and you can find it on all podcast platforms.

Wondering if you are an emotional eater? Sign up for the free Am I an Emotional Eater Quiz.

Summer Bucket List: Self-Care

Summer Bucket List: Self-Care

Facebooktwitterpinterestlinkedinmail

When my daughter was in preschool, she came home with a paper listing 100 items for a “Summer Bucket List.” The paper proclaimed it had 100 fun things to do before summer kicks the bucket. 

This list had many items on it that were associated with summer: 

  1. Swim until dark. 
  2. Walk on the beach.  
  3. Have breakfast for dinner. 

I had heard of a bucket list as being kind of morbid related to what you want to do before you die. It had never occurred to me that it could be expanded to a list you want to do over the summer. 

I looked at that list for a while and decide to make my own Summer Bucket List for me and my family. Now each summer we discuss what activities we want to do. I have learned that the only way to get these kinds of activities on the calendar is to write them down AND put them in the calendar. What is not on the calendar does not seem to get done. 

I like the idea and opportunity this gives us to be creative and ask for what we want over the summer. This list is fluid and can expand or contract as needed. 

This Summer Bucket List is so fun and gets me and my family really thinking about what we each want over the summer. 

I love the Summer Bucket List, because it does not require you to spend any money, unless you want to.

What do you REALLY want to do this summer? 

Each summer I ask clients what they have planned for the summer. Often, they say they do not have much planned. Planning to do something fun IS self-care. The summer is the best time to focus on you and what you want. 

I find it is a time of connection with my family, too, to hear what they want to do over the summer. Sometimes the plans are as a family and sometimes the plans are alone or with others. 

 This summer is a great opportunity to put yourself first and make that list. Have you thought about what fun activities you can do over this summer?

This summer put yourself first on the list. 

Here are some strategies to start your Summer Bucket List. I suggest you spend 15-30 minutes contemplating the below questions.

  • What do you like to do AND have not done in a while?
  • What did you like to do as a child during the summer? 
  • What have never done, but really want to do.
  • What have you been afraid to do but really want to do?
  • What would give you pleasure? 
  • Use the Summer Bucket List to keep track of what you plan to do. 
  • First write down what you plan to do over the summer. 
  • Set up dates in your calendar to do them. 
  • Cross them off when you accomplished them. 
  • Remember to keep extra spaces on your list to add through the summer.

Enjoying the summer season is just good for you.

Join me this summer and create your Summer Bucket List (download here). Join me in the Feed Your Soul Community Facebook Group where we will support each other to make AND use our Summer Bucket List. Being in community can be the best way to get inspiration and accountability to get your self-care moving forward. 

Kim McLaughlin, MA is a Counselor, Speaker, Podcaster, and Inspirational Coach who specializes in working with people who suffer from binge eating and emotional eating. She is a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. She is the author of the book Feed Your Soul Nourish Your Life! A Six Step System to Peace with Food and the Amazon #1 Best Selling book Discovery Your Inspiration

You can find Kim on her podcast Feed Your Soul with Kim and you can find it on all podcast platforms. 

Wondering if you are an emotional eater? Sign up for the free Am I an Emotional Eater Quiz. 

Intuitive Eating: We Need a Community

Intuitive Eating: We Need a Community

Facebooktwitterpinterestlinkedinmail

True confession: I am an extrovert. I get my energy from being with others. I know many others who are not like me and are introverts and need time alone. Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, there is a need for community. 

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary has a few definitions of community: 

  • People with common interests.
  • Group of people with a common characteristic.
  • People with a common history.
  • People in a common location.
  • Social Activities where we have fellowship. 

Basically, people with something in common and who want to join together for a common reason.

Community and the Pandemic

The idea of community has expanded especially over the time of the pandemic. 

We were told to stay home, but what about community? 

How do we gather? 

It became tough to go out and even tougher to find places to go out to. 

As an extrovert, I found the isolation not as bad as I had thought. It gave me time to be quiet and introspective. My introverted friends were in heaven with the time alone. 

My gym started with posted workouts we could do at home alone. I was not too drawn to that. I go to the gym for the companionship/community and mostly motivation. To say I was excited when my gym decided to get us a physical workout in a safe way is an understatement. 

We had workouts in the rainy weather, in the cold mornings. 

We had meet ups in the park to do park workouts. 

We distanced at the gym and lots of other creative ways to workout in community. I found I needed my community. I cried when there were rumblings in our area that we would be on lock down again. I did not know how I could handle not being able to go to a workout. 

Everyone has stories showing the strong pull we have towards being in community. 

To be in community, we try to find: 

  1. People with a commonality to us.  
  2. People who will like us. 

Why do people join in community?

  1. To share new ideas, insights, suggestions, and lessons they’ve learned. 
  2. Brainstorm new ideas based on different information. 
  3. Ask and answer questions. 
  4. Collaborate, interact, and have conversations.  
  5. Learn from new people to the group/community. 
  6. Learn from people’s successes and failures.
  7. Get an idea or an answer. 
  8. Feel supported. To tell our story to others who can appreciate what we have been through. Talk to people who can empathize with what we have been through. 

Virtual vs In Person Community

Before the pandemic there were wonderings if we can be in real relationships when we are virtual. I think the pandemic showed we can be in community virtually and it can be satisfying. 

  1. Virtually you can target your areas of interest to find others like you.
  2. The other value to virtual you can find others at times that fit with your lifestyle. 
  3. In person there is the win of the physical connection. 

Overall, there are so many wins from being in community (virtual or in person).

  1. You get to determine your level of commitment and the more you are committed the more you can get back. 
  2. You meet new friends. 
  3. You learn new skills and get new ideas. 
  4. You get the support of the group.
  5. You join with like-minded people who are interested in the same things. 
  6. You get to speak up and be heard without judgment. 
  7. You contribute to the betterment of all. 
  8. Increase self-esteem- we are meant to be in community, in collaboration with others. 
  9. Can help you with difficult situations.  

When it comes to intuitive eating, we need a community.

In regular community there is a focus on weight loss, diet talk and fat shaming. With intuitive eating, we are looking for community focused on food peace and weight peace.  

I invite you to look at a community that supports eating intuitively, no focus on weight loss, no focus on the numbers on the scale and no focus on fat shaming. It is critical to be in a community that looks at you as a person not what you ate earlier. You need a place where like-minded people support you for you. 

How are you going to join in community?

I invite you to a few ways to get that support:

  1. Like the Feed Your Soul Community Facebook Group page. It is a free group of like-minded people who are focused on freedom with food. 
  2. Sign up for Emotional Eating Solutions where we have added a community component. You get to talk with others who are looking at food differently and feel that sense of community that we crave.
  3. Listen to my Feed Your Soul with Kim podcast for community inspiration.

Kim McLaughlin, MA is a Counselor, Speaker, Podcaster, and Inspirational Coach who specializes in working with people who suffer from binge eating and emotional eating. She is a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. She is the author of the book Feed Your Soul Nourish Your Life! A Six Step System to Peace with Food and the Amazon #1 Best Selling book Discovery Your Inspiration

You can find Kim on her podcast Feed Your Soul with Kim and you can find it on all podcast platforms. 

Wondering if you are an emotional eater? Sign up for the free Am I an Emotional Eater Quiz.